Random Shots

Auckland Star, Volume LIX, Issue 225, 22 September 1928, Page 2 (Supplement)

Random Shots

by zamiley

Aa was predicted in this column months ago, _ Parliament approved • the title of Mr. Coates' Licensing Bill. *

The City Council has agreed to the establishment of a transport board. Perhaps councillors, like the public, were becoming transport-bored.

The only thing left for Aucklanders to do now, since the visit of Kingsford Smith, is to take the air. . Some, of course, may still prefer-to take it on terra firma.

More dark doings at the Town Hall! A meeting, convened by critics of the city administration "came to an abrupt termination when the caretaker began to turn out the lights." Did he think the electric light was being wasted?

"Boxing is a brutal sport," Gene Tunney is reported to" have said. The. remark is not original, but Tunney is the first man to make it after accumulating £200,000 in the business. One of these days, perhaps, we shall hear Henry Ford say that the motor car is beneath him.

Kingsford Smith deserves well of .Auckland. Thousands of pecple have long agreed that the view from Mount Eden and Mount Mangere is indeed very fine. On Tuesday dud Wednesday they climbed up and saw it for' themselves.

"Cleanliness is next to godliness." The ratepayers have not only refused to permit the building of. new baths,, but they have rejected • a proposal to improve the existing ones. A recent demonstration suggested that Aucklanders are not as godly aa they might be. Must they lose their cleanliness, too?

A French author has written a play in which the British are blamed for the death of the Prince Imperial while fighting against the Zulus in 1879. If the play writer ever read the newspapers he would know that the nations find plenty of pretexts in the events of 1928 for quarrels' without going back fifty years.

"Forty-four Little Brothers are sailing from London for Australia by the Largs Bay on September 18." This news reminds us of the friendly native chief, who offered his services and those-of his tribe at a period when the English troops' in the South African war were anxious to avoid accepting native assistance. After repeated refusals the colonel approached consented to accept only the help of the chief end his sons. One morning the chief arrived with twenty-seven young men under the age oi 24 and introduced them as "some of my sons."

"Timaru people who .journeyed- to Christ church by special train to see the arrival of the Tasman flyers, were simply fooled," said one passenger. He added thajb "it was, not till the train had pulled out of Ashburton station that the passengers were told that the Southern Cross had arrived some ten minutes before, and it was a shame that the authorities, who evidently did not want to miss any traffic from Ashburton, had hot made passengers conversant with the news of the arrival until the train had left that station." "Money back*' is not a railway slogan, and if a crowdtakes train to see an event already over the event and not the railway is responsible. Nevertheless this conduct of the railway officials made the Southern ■cross."

It is the confirmed opinion of both Mr. C. E. Morgan, manager of the touring Waratahs, and of Mr. A. J. Geddes, a New Zealand selector and the manager of the New Zealand team, that the wing forward must very soon disappear" I cannot hut think that all this talk against the wing forward is empty, and simply a case of giving a dog a bad name. Why not change the name to goodwill forward," and so he up with the times? Perbaps the duties of the winger might he made ceremonial in character. To him might be allotted the duties of carrying the bouquet of forget-me-nots for presentation to the opposing side, and of bowing the acknowledgments of his own team to the crowd when it applauded a piece of good plav. Little touches like these would win the hearts of the old ladies who go to football matches, despite that they think it "such a dreadfully rough game." REAL FOOD. Mr F L. Armitage, in an address to the Auckland Agricultural Science Club said that "It might yet be possible to ! realise the scientist's dream of converting | the evening newspaper into sugar for sweetening next morning's coffee.'' " W SJ& H^ e are' eakfaßt menU? " Teßsir ' ,UBt D S^KS» ho,oe from last ""■jSßttSW blunt T temPtiDS disbes Bacteria have done their Job—a transformation stunt Has changed the crowded columns of the daily scroll of fame To merry little vitamines that build the human frame; * And if your hunger indicates which nourishment is best, You simply pick the items and the microbes do the rest.

Supposing your digestion calls for "something solid, please." ™ A pickled editorial will put your mind at ease; For dainty tastes—the women's page you're sure to land a "bite"; ' For vim and stamina and speed —the sporting page is right; For butter, use the farming notes —a scientific hint Sffl, ed ?i^ te tocteria to fatten us on print; While if you're merely peckish try your gastronomic fads - On tasty little "nibbles" that you'll find among the ads.

What-ho if wayward tastes incline to something like a roast! There'll be a run on columns where they've creditors on toast. ' For sugar—why not Indicate some phase of Where honeyed words and promises the party platform fix? For members of the "mustard club" who like a little spice. Divorce and police court piccalillis probably . suiflce: • WU, t if ,*» he d ? ct °r's orders say your.figures should reduce, Just try a daily fricassee of tips and mining news.

Thus science leads ua on the way to irer our breakfast food fc *™^ v 2E&**JP t *¥ W* P** ™ade out oi ress and. wood; The evening paper will become, the prophet now explains. The pabulum to nourish both our bodies and our eralns: Right-no. jny friend! Well take the tip! Conditions you describe Won't be a bit of trouble to the boys who now subscribe; But all who don't wjll rash to boy when busy newsboys shriek: • *• "Evenin' paper! Brain food! Breakfast! Ninepence every weekl'i