MILITARY ANECDOTES.

Auckland Star, Volume XXXVI, Issue 30, 4 February 1905, Page 12

MILITARY ANECDOTES.

I j STOSMED! a j A Miss Bacbaaaa was once ra-Hyins her ; ] eonsin. an officer, on his courage, and I j rashly said: . I "Now, Mx Harry, Ao jcra really n*ean to . j teD mc yon can wait up to the canson's I mouth withont fear?" "Tes." was the prompt reply, "or a i Buchanan's either." And he at once did ! it! " IRISH SENTRY. ; During the war in Spain, an Irish peasant, who was posted with a musket on t duty and had wandered a Bttle oot of his ■ position, was accosted by an oflicer with.: : "What are ytwi here for, my man?" I "Faith, yonr hoooar." said Pat, with : his actmstoiaed grin of good bunKwir; "they r tell mc lam here for a c^atnry!" PHUiOSOPHX. Felix ICeCartiy, of the Kerry MTTiH*, 'was generally tore on psrade. s "Ah, Fefix," avid the serseaat, "raa are ; always lest." ; "Be aisy, sergeaet," was fl» reply. "•Slrare, souse oae mast be test" i. _____ PRAKK RHSPEI. > A certain captain, 'having ran beyond . his income, was nnder the necessity of seU- > ing a pxeat part of his equipage. Sonte few - days afterwards, as he was walking by the ■ road side, l*e saw one of has men sitting • end cleaning himself under a hedsre. "What are- you ooins there, Tom?" asked the officer. "Why, faith, sir," answered the soMier, • "I am foilowing yoor example—garting < rid of part of my rethn7e!" 1 i / ■ CALM A>rr» COURTEOUS. ; j An officer of very small stature, and 1 ■ rery hasty temper, was one day vehement--1 i ly scolding one of his men, a soldier of uns : common size. The man eudured the or&eel ' j for some time in patience, the storm of 1 Ttt-npcration rising up to Mm from his ' : diminutive chief. ■ ! Finding. hoTrt-ver. that instead of abat--1 j ing the rage of hie officer appeared to inj crease, he qraetly said to the comrade next 1 'him: • : "John, go and fetch a stool. ' I believe I the captain wants to give mc a box on the s j esrr i —— CT.TRED BY BULLET; '' One of Wellington "s aides-de-camp, dnri I ing the peace preceding the escape of ,'■ Napoleon from Elba, had gone to Toiqnay 3 j for the benefit of Ms heaitli. being afflictwl 1 I wrth consumption. On h-earing that the t J French Emperor was again in Paris, and i tnowin? that war must easne. the officer 5 , sent for his medical man and asked him " j how long, with cere, he might hope to live. t '•'Wat-h «&re. several moaths," replied the doctor, after some hesitation. "Several months only," said the officer, "Then I may as well <£c in battle as In my c ! bed." '• IHe rejoined his regiment, fwijrhrf at I I Waterloo, received a woand which toot s J aw«.y ail the diseased past of his lungs, s ; and Kved. many yeais longer! s 1 es past days. The following incideat is related fn the Q "Life of Sir George Pollock." a_d concerns j j the capture of Bhartpore (1805). _ I As Went. Pollock and his friend -were [ I proceeding towards the citadel, they passed gi a Bnropean guard, and, going up to the _ j sergeant of infantry in charge of the party, £ j for .the purpose of learning the -way to the j gate of the citadel, the night being veiy dart, they asked what he was doing there. „ ''Oh. sir. we are in charge of some prisj oners,"* replied the mm. -Piasoners! Where _i« i_teyT' aekwJibe j artillery officer. "Well, sir," rejoined the sergeant, ■witix an air of frankness, bet not in th* least j abashed at the confession, **rre jest sfcfpered taem aJl!" The reader needs perhaps to be tola that 'slriFering" -was a synonymous term in the Tocairnlary ef a»e eergeant fer bayoneting. WORDY DUEL.. j i A weß-known officer used t* reUte the j following -with much gnstxr. — Laent. F .of the Gnards (to Lieat. S . also of the GoarSsi: I say. S , is r i it true that yonr father -was only a shopI teeper? j I lAent. S : Quite true. What of it? I Lieut. F : Oh, nothing: ooly it was a i great pity, I Qiini. that Ik didn't make yoe - I one . : Liem. S : Toa tniat bo? Well, opln- . Urns differ. But Jet sac ask y»o, wiimt wu fc your fatlia , ? j Ltent. P, *: My father! Why, my-fxtt**, , of coarse, was a sentleman, Lient. ST>: Ah, and wbat a pity a* «d t not make yon one! r EBCRtJIT'S KEQCBST. ' j When Private Cotter had beat a *ew r . days at drill as a recruit, the sergeant in I j charge of the sqnafl had reason one mornLos to reprimand htm for moring in the rants. "Pat your bands downr" h* cried, "tnd I keep them to yoar sides." • j Cotter obeyed; bet soon fwgetting tae ■ i order, was again checked for unsteadiness. "Yon mnst not move or lift a flnger while i at drill," roared the sergeant. "If I have t occasion to warn yoo again, m enuo yoa 1 into the mill'" A sort of bomet now happeoed to perch on Cotter's inflaased proboscis, and In its ' I peregrinations the insect performed a va- • I riety of disagreeable evolutions thai, atade • the nnfortanate recruit sneasy. With the persecßtion of the little peat k* ! bore up manfully, till his patience was at i ] last exhausted, and cot daring to more, re- > 1 buked as he had been tor unsieadinea*. be j announced the inconvenience t© the aer- ' geant. I "Silence:" interrupted the nen-ewn., i slttking his cane. "You mast neUt«r speak ■ nor more in the ranks. Do it bnt once J -again, m the plan to core yen." > "If I'm not te more or apeak." mud » Getter, aogray, "cenie yeewrtt, tfcea, ami •|*»<* tMB casfoanded ftf it wr mm ~