The Hackman in Court.

Auckland Star, Volume VI, Issue 1695, 24 July 1875, Page 6 (Supplement)

The Hackman in Court.

'Your name is-is—what?' asked the court

' Davey, sir—George Davey.' 1 .And you work at—what?' ' Drive hack.'

1 Ah—ha !' smiled his Honor, acquiring sudden interest; ' this is worth twenty dollars to me You are one of those men who stand on the edge of the walk at the depots and shout 'Bax!'at people?' (I have to git passengers, sir.' ' Don't eass me back, Mr. Davey. 1 know all about you! Only the other day, as I returned from a May-day party in the country, there were one million five hundred and sixty-five thousand three hundred and ninety, two of you on the curbstone,?and every one of you yelled ' Hax!' at me. One seized my satchel, another grabbed at my coat, and another pulled me backward by the coat-tails. I believe you are that man!'

' Indeed sir, I haint.'

' Well, its barely possible that I am mistaken; but here's a charge that you were lying on the walk, drunk.' 'I wasn't, sir; I was sitting up alongside a house.' 'That's too fine a point to argue. Were you drunk ?'

'Only sprung, sir; only a little sprung.' ' That's just as bad in the sight of the law, and I ought to fine you $700 ' ' Grashus! but I could never pay that!'

'No; my object would be to keep you in prison all your days.' ' Oh, let up on a feller,' pleaded the prisoner. ' This is the first time, and it shall be the last. I've a large family, sir, and they need my wages to get their bread.'

His Honour took a long time to think, and then replied: ' It's wrong to let you off. The citizens will condemn me, and the news papers will blow at me, but I believe I'll give you a show. You may go, but I shall keep watch of you. You must mend your ways right off. Instead of yelling 'Hax!' at a man, do you smile and softly whisper: 'Sir, can I have the pleasure of conveying you to some designated point?' Promise me this.'

The prisoner promised, and was allowed to disappear limping sadly with a sore heel.— Detroit Pree Press

The saying, ' Excuse haste and a bad pen,' has been attributed to a pig who rau away from home.