MUNCHAUSEN AT TIMARU.

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume V, Issue 438, 1 October 1880, Page 3

MUNCHAUSEN AT TIMARU.

" Captain" Win. Jackson Barry, exwnctioneer, ex-butcher, and lecturer, has been airihg-forj rather attempting to air— hie eloquence and knowledge ■of Queen's English in Timaru, and at the same time to " turn a 'onest p«jnny." Hβ announced in the papers hie intention to deliver a lecture in the Oddfellows' Hall there, on—

" What I saw, in England." t An audience of about 100 persons ?att«nded to hear this

" gallant son of Neptune 1, discourse on th e many great and " wonderfool " things he

had seen in England and elsewhere. The Chairman for the occasion was a friend to whom the Captain had been introduced at v The Club" under what he called a

11 plebeian pattroniemic," but who, to his subsequent surprise and delight, he was assured was no other than a real live count in disguise. Punctually at 8 o'clock the Captain and his distinguished Chairman

(dressed in the orthodox garb of presiders of meetings) pompously strode across the platform. At that moment an egg of very antique flavor collided with the Captain's right shoulder, warning him that he would have something very strong to deal with during the evening, in the shape of rotten eggs and an audience, determined to have some sport at his expense. Another Qgg raised the Captain's ire considerably, and he descended from the platform, and inarched through the audience, ejaculating,

44 Where's the man that threw that.hegg ?" A gentlemanCpresdrit assured the skipper that the egg was meant for the Chairman, and he remounted his stump, appeased by the assurance. After asking for a patient hearing, etc., the Captain went on to say that "he was not a Beaconsfield, a Gladstone, or a John Bright, but an experienced colonist of 51 years standing."

Captain Barry is the son of a veterinary surgeon—at least, »o he saj §, and surely none of our readers are ■ mean enough to question the veracity of- • hie statement.

[t will be discovered next that the Captain ias legitimately assumed his title. The

" eloquent " lecturer told hie audience how at an early age "he set out in a vessel that sprang a leak, and run short of water. On the trip, twenty-four deaths died from measles." Mr Barry is certainly a wonderful man, and must have experienced many strange things—if one is gull enough to believe his yarns. After he had been " raised to the years of manhood by a 'transported butcher—the Captain seems to have always been in rather questionable and ''greasy" Company : first a butcher, and afterwards a whale—he had an exploit with a levyat/ian of (he deep ; ho solemnly asserted that he hnd 4t swam on the back of a whale for several hours." William ia evidently a little demented, so we won't contradict his statement.

The audience had not been very sparing with intenuptions and bad eggs ; the latter were mostly aimed at the Chairman who at last stood up to protest against so many of the eggs " coming his way," when a goose's egg smashed on his."dickey, , ' and trickled down hie manly breast. The uproar having teased, the Captain proceeded to spenk " about the outlines of his autobiography, written by himself," but the audience, not seeing the value of his offer, refused to hear " about his life." After going to the Chinee War—a war in a china shop, with a bull as the prime mover of the affray, we think he meant — William went to the Kalseforney diggings. " Then New Zealand I roke out." He went to Qneenstown (Lake Wakatip), Otago, where ho was an wiotioneer; there "he wrote his life." About a dozen egga here winged their way from tho body of the hall, and "alighted" in the region of the Captain's abdomen and chest, causing him to literally foam with rage; he said, too, " that in all his travels he never saw such people as calls 'emselves gentlemen. , ' William then referred to Sir Julius Vogol &i being an old chum of his, but if he did lond him £15 (as Barry says), we don't think he will care to be called " Julius " by a man who is his inferior in every respect but one, and that is—colonial oheek. Some one called for a song, and the lecturer gave "a something" composed by himself and commencing— " Who wrote a book of wondrous tales, And stories about hulks and jails, And floated on the backs of whales ? Chorus (by the audience) — Capting Jackson Barry. A local wit and some eggs here " went for tho lecturer," and he descended from his perch into the body of the hall, and, mounting a form, wanted to know who were the "eggists." Seeing no one cared about telling, and no chance of a row, he got quite couiageous, and said, " Come on; I am an old 'tin, but a game 'un yet. Come on, one at a time," etc. The meeting then terminated in a scene of indescribable confusion. This is the man who was sent home by the Government to lecture on the advantages of New Zealand. Verily the Brit ishers must have a good opinion of colonials, if they consider Captain Barry a fair specimen of us. But what a chance for the larrikin element, should the Captain be disposed to visit AKaroa ! They would be able to work off some of the superfluous steam which of late has been bottled up, all tbe late entertainments having been so horribly respectable !