ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume 4, Issue 360, 30 December 1879, Page 3

ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

(Collated from our Exchanges.)

A Minnesota father who has five grownup daughters, has sued the county. He •claims that his residence has been used as •a court-house for the past two years.

"Do you know a good way of curing hams ?" asked a man of his neighbor. " Oh, yes," was the reply ; " but the trouble ■with me is, I have no way of procuring them."

A Virginia woman refuses to marry a bald-headed man. though he is a millionaire. She explains: "We'd have a family fight sometime, and he has no hair to catch hold of."

It is when a drygoods clerk of sixtyseven pounds weight attempts to help from a farm waggon a farmer's wife of 202 pounds weight that the reporter seats himself contentedly on the curbstone and waits for the catastrophe.

"Young man," said a stern old professor to a student who had been charged with "kissing one of his daughters, " young man, don't get into that habit. You'll find that kissing is like eating soup with a fork." " How so sir ?" asked the student. " Because," answered the stem old professor, " you can't get enough of it." v, Little Johnny says ole Gaffer Peters gits fooler and fooler every day of his life. One day my father, he seen that ole man a-diggin a hole for to set a post in, and my father he sed, " Gaffer, wot will you do with che erth you take put of the hole ?" Gaffer he thot a long wile, and scratch his hed, and bime-by he sed. " I guess I'll have to bury ** ~n a other hole." Then my father ho. ±&, " You better left it in thisn and dug a other for the post." Then Gaffer he spoke up and 6ed, " It ain't too late yet.' So he put the erth back into the bole wich lie had dugged, and wen my father he come away Gaffer was a diggin a other hole for to set lis post into. There is nothing so sweet as to be loved,

cept loving. The true pure love which is not a thing of the senses, but of the soul—love that is the outgrowth of goodness—what will one not do to win or keep such tenderness? What will one not risk, or dare, or forsake for it ? Is any journey long that has a love-kiss at the end of it—any duty hard that cements the bonds between two hearts ? To be truly loved is the great reward life has to offer. And any one who has a heart and does not mind showing it, who can put aside Selfishness and be true to otherw, can win love. To have people temporarily in love with you needs only beauty. To be beloved, one must have truth, tenderness, constancy, and responsiveness. Be good, and do good, and, despite all that is said about this world's ingratitude, some one will love you.