ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume 3, Issue 277, 14 March 1879, Page 2

ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

(Collated from our Exchanges.) The curious freakß caused by drink have frequently caused amusement (says the New Zealand -Times), and an instance occurred during last week, Which has certainly the merit of singularity, to a man who has frequently been before the Police Magistrate for drunkenness, and who, besides being very far gone in intoxication at the time, has the disad vantage of being partially blind. After the Court had risen, Paddy strayed in, and after groping about for some time, found his way into the dock and faced the empty bench, expecting, no doubt, to hear the sonorous voice of the Clerk of the Court say, " You are charged with being drunk." . That is not what the Clerk said, however, his enquiry being, "What do you want "Guilty, your Worship," said Paddy. As he -seemed disinclined to leave the dock, a policeman was sent for, and he proved equal to the occasion, for, tapping Paddy on the shoulder, he said—•' You've got a month this time." Paddy followed him with an air of resignation, but in a lucid interval he thought there was some mistake, and he said—■" I don't know what I got that month for, any way." He, however, followed his leader in a hopeless, shiftless manner to the cell, and next day he was charged with being drunk, and mulcted in the usual panalty. An incident of a rather amusing character (says the Timaru Herald) occurred last Saturday afternoon. A gentleman whose I name we have not ascertained, butwho, for convenience sake, may be appropriately called John Gilpin, was riding from the direction of the Saltwater Creek, when in some unexplained manner the bridle fell off his horse's head. Mr Gilpin made an attempt to adjust the bridle, but in doing so he frightened the horse, which, finding itself unchecked, bolted away. Mr Gilpin used every means that lay within his reach to stop the frightened animal, but all proved unavailing. In coming up one of the hills he leaned forward, holding the horse's mane, until ultimately he got one of its, ears in his grasp, but this had not the desired effect.. He next laid hold of the other ear, and commenced to tug alternately at both of them, but the obstinate brute would not take the hint* and '. brought his rider into town, stretched : <r horizontally on his neck. Of course his

hat blew oft, hiahair was «iffied by the breeze, terror was depicted on his countenance, and he looked all over an object for commiseration, as he flashed through one street after another, uttering occasionally to looken-on in imploring toneß the terrifying words, " stop! stop I bolt 1" In this manner he was hurried down Brown street, up Latter street, down Heaton street, and along the Main South Road as far. as Bruce's saw-mill. Here his left hand got tired of tagging at the horses'ear, bat still he held on like grim death with his right hand, and the horse yielding to the pressure which was brought to bear on that-side of its head turned in off the road amongst the tusßocks, and stumbling once or twice, threw his rider to the ground. The horse ran away a few yards farther, but as if tempted by curiosity to know what had become of the victim of its own folly, it stopped, and turning round saw Mr Gilpin getting up off the ground unhurt, but very angry. After a good deal of coaxing, and many professions of kind intentions on the part of Mr Gilpin, he Induced the horse to wait for him, and after having adjusted the bridle he remounted and proceeded on his journey. One of the San Francisco papers gives an account of a new industry that has arisen in that city, namely, the manufacture of hens' eggs from inexpensive materials. The albumen is imitated by a mixture of sulphur, carbon, and fatty matter, obtained from the slaughterhouses and rendered sticky with mucilage. The yolk is made of blood, phosphate of lime, magnesia, muriate of ammonia, oleic and magaric acids, and colored with chrome-yellow. The shells are shaped by a plow-pipe from a mass of gypsum (plaster ofTaris), carbonate of lime, and oxide of iron. After the shells are blown, the albumen is forced in through a hole in the small end, and sticks to the sides; then the yolk is added, and after being covered with more ■of the albumen mixture the hole iB sealed with cement; the complete egg is then "rubbed pretty smooth and laid aside for packing." It is asserted that many barrels of these eggs j have been already shipped eastward for' consumption ; and as a pleasing adjunct to meat from the "slink butcher" they will no doubt be gratefully welcomed by British housekeepers in search of " cheap and nutritious " food. A Sensible Archdeacon.—lt is not often {says aNorthern exchange) that ministers of religion own their peccadilloes in such plain language as Archceacon Innes did recently at a Wealeyan tea meeting at Hamilton. He said—" People tell me they are getting full of tea meetings, and I fear the reason is because ministers of religion often make such great foote of themselves on such occasions. We talk so much twaddle that one would think the tea got into our heads! A gentleman who, on a Sunday, carefully prepares a sermon to deliver to his ordinary congregation, accepts an invitation to address double the number of people at one of these gatherings, and he begins by saying, " Ladies and gentlemen, I have not prepared a speech!" That is surely not a compliment to the company! Moreover: aome of the anecdotes related at times are eimply imbecile. We must make our tea meeting speeches more manly, and take more pains in their preparation, and especially have a care mat our anecdotes are truthful." In referring to the contents of religious publications, lie says they centain " such weak little * goody' stories, that the hard-headed world begins to laugh at us as weak mollycoddlings fed on literary pap."