ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume 3, Issue 261, 17 January 1879, Page 3

ONE THING AND ANOTHER.

(Collated from our Exchanges.)

" I understand you make very good cider ?" " Yaw," said the Dutchman ; "Hans, my boy, go pring a mugful." Hans soon returned with a mug brimming full, and handed it to the Dutchman, who drained it to the bottom at one draught; then turning to the astonished visitor, said, " Dere now, if you dosh not tink dat is goot cider, yoost schmell of te mug." Makart, the great Viennese painter, ia possibly the most taciturn man in the world. An American who had been told that the best way to get on friendly terms with the artist would be to play chess with him at the cafe to which he resorts nightly, watched his opportunity, and when Makart's opponent arose, slipped into the vacant chair. The painter signed to him to play, and the game began and went on, with no other sound than, the moving of the pieces. At last the American made the winning move, and exclaimed, " Mate 1" Makart, in disgust, ran out, saying angrily, to a friend who asked why he left so early, " Ob, I can't stand playing with a chatterbox!"

A correspondent .writes to a London evening paper:—"Few persons would be prepared to believe offhand that the whole population of the globe could, as far as space is concerned, 6tand with ease upon the Isle of Wight. That this, however, is possible is clear from the following figures :—According to the most recent estimate, the population of the earth is at the'present time about 1.440,000,000. Allowing two square foot of standing room to each individual,' this number would cover 320,000,000 of~"_quare yards, or 66,115 acres. The area of the Isle of is 93,341 acres."

"To edit a.iiewspaper," says Rev. Mr Talmage, " requires thht one be a statesman, an essayist, a geographer, in fact an encyclopasdia." Yes, and when you have done so with distinguished success for the better part of a lifetime, the statesman, essayist, geographer, and encyclopaedia of a rival sheet will seat himself at his desk with a heavenly smile and an even pulse, and tranquilly aver that you are a brassbound and double-riveted centennial idiot, and a roaring, rib-nosed johndonkey of the windy wild!

They were looking at the Fall style of bonnets. Said she, " Oh, dear,; look at that bird in the crown ; what a pretty bill!" And because he wiped his eyes with his handkerchiefs and murmured: "I should say-ifc—was a pretty bill," she became melancholy, and threatened to leave him and go home to her mother.