Social Hoods.

Alexandra Herald and Central Otago Gazette, Issue 405, 11 February 1904, Page 2

Social Hoods.

♦ MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS. S9KO their honour be it said, many ifeM(| mothers treat daughters in a tSPfeS rational manner. They treat them as companions; they initiate them into the mysteries of housework ; they teach them the art of buying, and spending money to the best advantage. But there is, alas! another type of mother—the one who seems to think that a daughter is always a child, and never attains an age of .responsibility. We all know girls who hive mothers of this latter sort. Poor, crushed creatures these young women are. Many of them dare hardly call their souls their own. Thay are not allowed to choose their friends—the mothers see to that—and the consequence is the girls are probably made to wnscrfc with companions who have no tastes in common with them, asd the unhappy girls are deprived of one of girlhood's greatest charms—congenial company. Bat some mothers go a step further than this; they will not allow daughters to invite friends indoors. The girls are allowed to attend at this house, that house, and the next house; but as for inviting the girls of these houses in return, that they dare not do. Naturally the unfortunate girls get talked about, and in time wear a crushed, disappointed look. As for young men—goodness ! The young womeß are brought up in such a manner that male society is looked upon as a positive sin; and the years pass, an£, lo and behold, they find out one day that they are old maids, and nothing more; but the mothers still keep a tight hold on the-reins. If these girls have any ambitions they dare sot gratify them if the mothers be opposed. They might have a notion to i go out to business, but if the parent says' No/ what can the girl do P As for housework, why, the mothers won't trust them to do anything in this line, and bo they grow up useless in every way. What if the parents dief What be*

comes of these unhappy girls P They can do nothing, and if the fathers die first, and she mothers follow;-and- the girls are unprovided for, their outlook is indeed a blank one. I hold that a mother has no right to thus treat a daughter. The latter shonld be taken in hand as early as possible, and' instructed in all necessary branches of domestic work, If the girl has an inclination to go forth into the world and earn a little, no mother Jhas a right to crush this desire. It shows "'not only a spirit of independence, but -a willingness to be of use, and an eagernesl totlearn. As for choosing a girl's friends; or denying a girl the right to ask a friend to the house, both of these are foolish and cruel. How can any girl develop mentally if she be hot allowed to act a little for herself.

As for interfering where lovers, or rather where young men, are concerned, that is a different matter, and would require an article to itself. It is a delicate subject* but mothers, in my opinion, are certainly quite justified in interfering up to a certain point. Still, they should not go too far, and by so doing deprive girls of chances to marry. A mother is just a kind of trustee, after all; she should do her best for her girls. If she fails to do so, she fails in one of the chief duties of her life;

A mothei's duty is so to train a girl that she will tarn out a useful member of Society—one ready to take up the duty of wife and mother; but if parents persist in crushing daughters, and treating them constantly as children, the women become failures in life, and through no fault of their own. I have met young women of thia sort frequently, and have always pitied them. They wear such a pansive, listless, one might almost say useless, look; they have the appearanca of girls in a state of decline in too many cases, and this is just what might be expected. The natural tendencies, the individual bent of mind, being stuated, one can only expect the girls to grow up insipid, sickly types of womanhood,

MAKRIAGE AND LONG LIFE. Some curious statistics are published with regard to the relative merits, from the poiat of view of long life, of the single, married'and widowed states. From the age of 15 to 44, married men are worse off than the single, with the exception of cases of consumption, and the same rule applies to all married women. Widows and widowers seem to die very quickly in comparison with those still married. Between the ages of 45 and 64 the canditions are reversed, as regards married and single, and the married men and women have an infiaitely better time of it. As between the married and widowed at the same period of life, widowers come to hopeless grief, whilst widows do not appear to suffer to any great extent. Over the age of 65, married men have a tremendous pull over the single ; this is not so much the case with the women, but still the married women are better off than the single. As between the still married and tho widowed, widowers have no show at all, whilst widows, excapt as regards circulatory diseases, do very well. In fine, it is better to be married than single, and it is better not to be a widower; while, if you want to live long, it is better to be a woman than a man.