Social Moods.

Alexandra Herald and Central Otago Gazette, Issue 403, 28 January 1904, Page 7

Social Moods.

IS CONVEBSATION UNDESIRA.BLE P <SSE HA.VS of tea wondezed why converMP sation should be considered such a JK necessary adjunct to social gatherings. In suggesting this view, I wish to differentiate between ' talk' and ' conversation. One person may talk, but it requires at hast t«o to * converse.' The minister in the pulpit, the lecturer on the pktform, and the up-to-date ' Mrs. Candle.' all 'talk,' and, aB to interfere with individual efforts in this direction is to interfere with the liberty of the subject, I have no objections to offer , What 1 do object to is the forced and artificial conversation which is one of the great evils of the day. Snppose you are lonely, and you go to see another man who U lonely. It follow that you want to converse, or that he does, It may bo quite snffijient for each of you to see tie other, but, in spite of this, you feel it incumbent on you to converse, in order that there may be some apparent reason for tbe meeting. This is manifestly absurd If your friend feels that he wants to say something to you, let hi m say it, by all means; but wby should you answer him if you h&ven t got a suitable reply ? One cf the moßt delightful men I am privileged to know is a great taker, but a very poor conversationalist. He meets me in the club, and talks to me for hours at a time. He has no absurd prejudices or conventionalities as to the necessity of any reply from me. My silence is not rudeness, but pure gold to him. I never interfere with hie tastes, Bor he with mine. If he chooses to

1 talk, and I choose to read a paper or 'magazine,- he talks whilel readWe have spent njany happy hours togetherin this way, and oar mutual attraction is so great that he selects me out of all ; the club members to talk"" to, and uiore especially wheu he sees that I am engaged in the perasual of some .periodical, and, therefore, fin a thoroughly contented form of mind. ". As an example of useless conversation, an average dinner-party. Your right-hand neighbour 'makes a remark on bimetallism, which is a subject you never could understand. ~;,;., ; Tour left-hand neighbour is anxious'to V n °? your candid opinion on lordßaiis T . bur*?? latest diplomatic action, of which youhave never even heard.:*; > ,' . Too; yourself, ; wish to discuss - the probability of a certain horse •, winning a

paitam race,, bat you find, to your great disgust, that both your neighbours are ina lamentable Btate of ignorance and unpreparedness on this important topic. This kind of thing is going 6a all round the table. Everybody thinks he is sitting between the rwo most,»«iiitellijfeat people

I in the room, and all- agree that dinnerparties are very dull. ■;;■: --■•- '>>' ' . -The remedy is quite, simpler. •. Abolish conversation. * • ■'-■.. _ Those who wish to talk, let them talk! Let the othersthink and eat, ;and everyone will behappyv:'.; . ,* ' ;Ab a slight variation or extension* of this remedy, I wonld suggest as follows : h-ach invited gueßt should have a\flxed allowance of twelve questions, sir for his right-hand neighbour and six for his left, these questions to be propounded at suitable intervals during the repast. Copies of these questions must be sent to the host a week before the date of the dinner. These it will bs.the duty of the host to forward to the guest to whom they are to be addressed, allowing him plenty of time to prepare a suitable reply. He will thus, by dint of studying 'Whitaker' and other books of reference, manage to steer clear of inanity, and even in some cases, to impart valuable information. i This ' previous notice of the question' is demanded by the highest officials in our own Parliament, and, when talented politicians thus confess their inability to give impromptu answers, it appears to be presumption for the average diner-out to attempt to do so. lam convinced that, when my remedy is adopted, desultory conversation will die out, and even dinner-parties will become very enjoyable and instructive functions.