LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Ashburton Guardian, Volume VII, Issue 2259, 21 October 1889, Page 2

LOCAL AND GENERAL.

♦ Forty thousand persons, inoluding pilgrims from England and Scotland, visited Enook on the Feast of the Assumption. < Mr Derbyshire, of Blenheim, is mentioned by the " Marlborough Expreaß " as being the , happy possessor and grower of a potato , weighing s|lbs. The Melbourne Exhibition building has been leased by Messrs H. P- Lyons and 0. MaoMahon, who intend converting it into an Australian Crystal Palaoe, m whiob variety entertainments will find a permanent home. A oarat of gold reoeived its name from the carat seed, or seed of the Abyssinian coral 1 flower. Tbjs was at one period made useful when gems of gold were to be weighed, and so oame about the peouljar and now general use of the word, Twenty two oarats fine means that out of tweDty four parts twenty two are gold, t»nd all the rest; alloy. The late Earl of Fife was extremely fond of his glass after dinner. His weakness was known to the whole Court, One night, as her Majesty was rising from the table, he delayed' her departure m bis high voice and with hia Bootoh aooent, interjecting, "Yere Majeßty will be pleased to boar that I have given up brandy and soda." "X am very glad 1 to hear it, Lord Fife," replied the Queen, "and I hope you will keep to it." "Yes, yere Majesty," replied Lord Fife, •• I have ohanged to whisky and appollinaria now.' ? Tbe Tudor Exhibition, of wbioh tbe Queen has consented to be patron and the Prince of Wales vioe-patron, will be held at the Hew 1 Gallery during the months of January to April next year. The Hod. Harold Dillon has undertaken the duties of aeoretary. The Exhibition will oompriee pictures, miniatures, arms, armour, plate, embroideries, carvings, boo]te, and manusoripts of the time from Henry ¥11 to Elizabeth, The pictures will include the portraits of eminent men and women of the Tudor period, as well as those | of the reigning Sovereigns. i A good story is going about of a zealous > oiHoer who was stationed at the door of a newly-opened picture gallery m one of our large provincial towns with striot orders not to allow anyone to pass without first depositing his walking-stick. A gentleman came aloDg with his hands m bis pookets, and was about to enter the building when the official seized him by the arm and said, " Where's i your stiok ? " "My etiok ? I haven't got i one." " Then you will have to go out and get one before I let you pass." Temperanoo leoluring is an excellent thing, but it is as well for leoturers to be oareful m their selection of " awful examples." A well moaning young man the other day ? wishing to illustrate tbe effeotg of alopbol, magnified i a email portion of water, and showed the frisking and swimming about therein, 25 * B tne wont °* tD ? s P e °>eB. He then oalled the a!. e ° ntion o! ]> IB audience tp the immediate effeot Ot .* o r °P of whisky, wbjfjb caused tbe inßtant decease of the wbolo of them. " Well," said an old lady as soon as she got over tbe first surprise, •• I'll never drink any water again without putting some whisky into Jfc"

A tetagram received from Giaborne to-day says that Mr A. Graham, M.H.B. for the East Coast Distriot, has forwarded his resignation as a member of the House of BapreBentntives to the Speaker. A Press Association message from New Plymouth says that the farm cadets brought ■ by Mr Courtney m the Ruapehu have all been } placed m situations on better terms than ho ( agreed to find them on leaving Eogland. There is still plenty of employment m Taranaki on farms and at flax mills. The " Medical Press " says there is a talk , of applying telephones to the infeotious wards of tbeT Fronah hospitals, so aa to enable the sick people isolated m their oontagious sufferings to have the comfort of hearing their ' relatives 1 voio?s without any risk of oonveying infeation by an interview. The privileges m oonneotion with the Ashburton A. and P. Association's Annual Show on Ist November were sold on Saturday by Mr Thomas, as follows : —The publicans' booths Noa. 1 and 2, Mrs Butler, £59 f r the lot; the twoconfeoionera' booths, Mr W. 0. Davis, £11 10s; right of sports, £1, Mr W. 0. Davis; oatalogues, 10a per dozen, Mr A. Oook, The Shah and his suite while at Manoheater plaoed extensive orders for maohinery, , inoluding steam dredgers euoh as he saw on the great Ship Canal works, for use m the Karum river, which the Chamber of Commerce is anxious to get dredged, and thus open up a vast district to Britsh commerce. Who knows but that ere another three years are paused we shall have ships leaving Salford dooks laden with bales and oases of Manchester goods for the Persian Gulf ? When a breaoh of promise aotion by a sprightly aotress againat the Btupid son of a , peer was apparently on the point of going into Court, an aunt of the faithless one called on a parson who »s known and respeoted by many members of the theatrioal profession. " Ob, do uae your influence," g&id the lady, "to prevent my nephew from marrying this wretched woman." " I shall do all I can," was the reply, ** to prevent this nioe girl from marrying your fool of a nephew." Visitors to the Paris Exhibition seem just now, says a home paper, intent on illustrating the Bupetfluousness of the very appliances of oivilisaiion which the World Show is designed to develop. Thus Herr Loewy, of the '< Vienna Extrablatt," showed it was quite possible for an Austrain to ace the Exhibition without availing himself of railways if he only possessed a gig and knew how to drive it. Then a Russian Cossack ofSoer, Lieut Michel Aaoef, went a step further and dispensed with the gig. He rode on horsebaok from Lubny to Paris. Now a party of a dozen English visitors have shown that the Paris hotels are not indispensable. They have taken with them a large tent, fitted with a portable stove, and twelve hammooks, and they camp out (at night on the no-man's-land beyond the fortification. An expressman named Samuel Elliott was charged at the Wellington Magistrates' Court on Thursday with haying assaulted a Gbiaaman. The Bench, m dismissing the case, aaid that the defendant evidently entertained the erroneous impression that there was one law for a Chinaman and another for a European, and the sooner he got rid of that impression the better, (" Hear, hear," remarked the defendant.) With the view of impressing the faot upon his memory he would be fined 40s and costs. The defendant: ••Will yon draw it a little milder?" Mr Blair: "No, I won't draw it any milder." The defendant asked for time m whioh to pay the fine and costs (17s), and the Bench allowed him a fortnight m whioh to do so, failing whioh he would have to go to gaol for fourteen days. A rather amusing and fortunately no* tragioal story concerning a policeman's •• blighted affeotions " oomes from Ooaobford, Ireland. Rumor has it that a certain constable named Coleman, Btationed at Coachford, haviag wooed and won the affeotions of a young lady m the vicinity of his station, waited on the fair one's father with a view to matrimony. The stern patent, however, refused his suit, and it is said that the dieooDßolate wooer determined to put an end to his trouble and existenoe at the same time, He ib reported to have loaded bia rifle with ball oartridge, and with the observation, "I may as well do it now as at any other time," was about to blow out his brainß when some of bt3 comrades wrenohed the weapon and prevented mischief, The despairing one was p'aoed under arrest and obliged m the County Gaol. The Auokland correspondent of tho "Otago Daily Times" Bays that Major>General Edwards expresses himself as on the whole satisfied with hia inspeotion of the Auokland volunteers, but is of opinion that if the Australian system was adopted of paying men a certain Bum per annum, the under-sized men oould be weeded out and a better olass of men as to physique obtained. The average physique of the Australian forces was superior. He thinks that under his scheme New Zealand oould obtain for £100,000 a year everything she requires to make an effective defence, and that the money should Bimply be regarded as a premium of insurance on ope of tho finest colonies m the British Empire. His opinion is that the European situation will oompel the 00-operation of these colonies for joint defenoe, and that this military federation will preoipitate politioal federation. \n oonneotion with his mission his idea is to have a federal small arms factory m Victoria, and a federal gun depot with equipment at Sydney, that m faot the colonies should aot m military matters as they have done m naval matters with regard to the new Australian squadron. An aneodote ia told m the *' Athen»utn<• whioh illustrates the already well-known generosity of Charles Dickens; but it may be doubted whether it will inorease his reputation for Bobriety of praotioal judgment. The events are related on the authority of the polioe offloial who was a chief aotor m them. Dickens had a favorite servant whom upon one occasion he entrusted with a bag of money (about £70), whioh was to be paid inte the bank. Leaving the bag for a few moments m the business room, he returned to find that the monej had disappeared There was no reason to suspect the servant, but Diokenß naturally thought it better to investigate the matter further.? A deteotive was sent for, but his profession was not revealed to the servant. The • ime story was again told; but the deteotive, notioing an uneasy look m the servant's eye, told Diokens that the truth had not been reaohed. Tho servant was again summpned, confronted with his master, and informed that the utranger was a deteotive. oonfeased that he had himself stolen the money m order to defray his losses on the Derby. Most men would have proseouted him, or at least have Bent him about hia business. Well, Dickons did discharge him ; but Battled on him an annuity of £50, m consideration of his previous good oonduat, and m fear that he might resort to some dishonest means of getting a livelihood. I i