MELBOURNE NOTES.

Ashburton Guardian, Volume VII, Issue 2116, 23 April 1889, Page 2

MELBOURNE NOTES.

(FROM OTJR OWN COBKEgPONDSST.}* A thanksgiving Service hts just been held m the Sydney Temple of Bicehua. Me Stipendiary Johnson has ruled that si man Is not din air m the eyes of the law as long as he oaa find his way home, and no ooDstable h»o * right to sweat a mad who is capable of parformlng that feat. Toe question as to when a man may be said to be truly drunk Ik one which has exeraiaed the minds- of men from the day that father Noah brewed hia peak o' malt —or whatever els* it was— down to the present time, and we are Indeed indebted to the " patty by the name of Johtuon *' for his philanthropic attempt to decisively settle the point. In order to ascertain now " whether a man is drank or not:" it will be necessary for the officious mlnton of the law to foliar the "suspect " to'hfi home, no matter whether it la one yard Of a hundred mil. 9 t»way Mr Johnson has, indeed, "filled a long felt want " (as the minor prophets nied to Bay), for few things have caused' the judicial mlad more trouble than the endaa7or to deoide as what itage a man oan be justly .aid to be Intoxicated. Upon one oocaslon, a oertain provincial town councillor, while giving evidence at a «« orowner'a 'quest," declared that the gentleman on tne table was not drank when he "blew down the gun to set* If tht thing wu loaded," but he had had " juafc a fair thing." On being asked to explain what a "fair thing >r was, tbe olvlo magnate replied that any respectable person might surround thirty whiskies aday, but tbe man who would drink more was a hog, A- good story cornea from a aonkhern ■Obutb of a remarkably righteous ohurob Incumbent of an Episcopalian Ohuroh, who became suddenly aware of the profane natures of hla bell-ringera. He took coansel with his curate. The end of It waa that the bell-ringers were dlioharged and the curate and a few of tbe oholc men agreed next Sunday morning to take their plaoes Now, none of these willing helpers had ever attempted bell-ringing before, and ifc waa with some feeling of apprehension that each took hla place and firmly grasped a rope. Slowly they began, and carious were, the resulting sounds, till suddenly the curate, giving a more vigorous tug than usual,, and keeping at the same time a firm grip of hla rone, waa entwined m theourling eolli. and with face waiter than hla anplioe, was carried op ai by a whirlwind among the rafters.' The. friends he left below had hardily time to mourn hia disappearance before with lightning-like rapidity he Joined them on earth, severely damaged and bleeding The Incumbent who had happened to ceme In at the moment of the upward flight, and had begun word* of solera* warning aboafc unseemly pantomime tricks, realUed that his remarks were not appropriate. All ropes wore, yoa may be sure, speedily let go, doctors and stfetchars were fetched and peaoefnl ohurob>goera mat the unpleasaut sight of tin wouoded man being carried from the slleat ohuroh. The curate lam glad to Bay, has reoovered, and haa expressed m emphatic tonea his oonvlotion that if a man haa a thiok skull and a oat-like itotivlty, and la willing to engage In such a foolhardy occupation v bell-ringing, you should not mind hia meals. . •; . The Combined Electric Pillar Box. Foltce and Fire Alarm is a very ingenloas contrivance, intended, as the name m. dioatea, to provide m one and the same thing a box where letters may be posted, and by whioh firemen and polloe may be summoned to any given locality. Aa a pillar box it Is a great improvement on those which are now m use m this city. It la so conslraated that letters may be cleared withoot expoaing them to 7 the wind and rain, while by some pieae of mechanism the opeuing and shutting of the door is made to indicate the next boar of clearance. All that Id required to summon tha pol-oa to tho spot or to give an alarm of fire, ia to preaa a button; thla, however, Id protected by a glaM oa'e that must first ba broken. Aa eJeattlo light Burmounts the atrnotnre, whioh m addition to its other manifold advantages, may therefore be atUUed aa a street lamp. The patent rights have, I uoderatand, bean purchased by a syndicate, who propoae bringing the ln» ventlon under the notice of the Governments of the several colonies , *