MELBOURNE TOWN TALK.

Ashburton Guardian, Volume VII, Issue 1956, 28 September 1888, Page 2

MELBOURNE TOWN TALK.

(From ouk own Oobbespondsnt.)

Louvrage, tncort Vouvrage, ton jours louvrage. Work, work, aU<*y» woik, co r.uus tue old French proverb, and here, 0 ice again, I take up my p3n to ohron'ole the small nothings that make up the sum total of the week's doings. I have no "adventure wild and tale of rath" to chron ; o'o ; nothing but the same sum total of Parliamentary , misdoings, land boomo, Exhibition commonplaces, town goaaip, and motropolitan ollapodrida that go to make up suoh letters as mine mask necessarily be. And that reminds me. I have commenced my epistle with a Feenoh proverb. A few days ago I reoeived • le-.ter frum a oorresp indent, blamlug ma for my frequent use of that language, and 1 herewith take occasion to answer him. French has been described wittily as *'the language m which one expresses impro* prle las with propriety." It is also the language of Idioms, and I find. I can eometiates pat In a few words that way what It would take a oambroai sentence In English to express. Hence my plrkhant for Idiomatic French, and I trust my correspondent (who, mora power to her, «s a lady — and a young and pretty one, I feel sate) will be satisfied with my explanation ...-'.•*•

Now what shall I write about first? The land boom is a good eabjeqfc, for It is coming ia with the hot weather more rampant than ever. The papers every day are filled with .notices of land satea, and every Saturday afternoon it is as muoh'as the railway authorities can do to keep enough trains going to meet the demand. Last Saturday, for instance, there were special train p run to Mitch&m, Footscray, Box Hill, G. nroy and Altona Bay; whilst to nine different stations special land-sale passengers had to be carri dby iln ordinary trains This is enormous, and aa the season advances there will be still more. Prices increase at enormous rates, aB much m suburban properties as m city. Relative to the latter, one of the first authorities m Melbourne, Mr Lamb Smith, the manager for Fraser and Co., Limited (one of the biggest firms of auctioneers here)— and an expert m land valueB — has given out, publicly that, m his opinion, the great rise m city properties is exceptional and not justified, and that a re- action is bound to come. This has cast something of a damper on the merry land-jobbers ;bufc next week it will be forgotten, and prices will go on rising the same as ever. Some

very curious outoomes have resulted from this land boom. Here is one. A couple of years ago there was a poor policeman named Joyce m Hawthorn. During his street-patrolling meditation must hays lent him discrimination, for having » hundred pounds or so put away, he invested it m & nice little blook.be passed and repaaaed on his usual beat. He told tbat at a good advance, and bought another he had under his eye, this time the greater part on bills, g.ving his few hundreds as deposit. That netted him a big profit, and now he is a director of several companiea, Is m the •• fooroe " no longer, and ranks as one of the Bucoassful

momed men of Melbourne. " A policeman's lot is not a happy one/ wrote Gilbert, but m this case it oerttialy was. Another man I know, who la supposed to be worth two hundred thousand if he is worth a penny, tild ma with glee that fonr years ago he had married on "three 'bus tickets and a spare salt of clothes." He began without any funds, by getting land under offer for a specified pßripd la writing. Then he woald seek about foe a purchaser at an advanced price. In one tranuactloo he assured me he netted * profit of five thoaeand pouads without having outlaid a penny— -jnd I believe him, knowing what I do of such things. This humorist blasts that he made his fortune out of the three #s, and on my aaklDg what they were, answered, "Debts, dnea and demands." He has Invented * new mode of advertising, which Is to give racing trophies and establish races at the various courses, bearing the name of the partloulat estates he Is Interested In— an expensive bat effiolent mode of bringing th 9 names of his enterpr'zas before tbe public. . A more enthualastlo advertiser than this gentleman I do not know, and he la fond of relating a story showing bow | one oan Ret anything by advertising. ! " You see, 1 ' he says with gusto, " I was a thorough believer m It, and so when my wife came to me one morning and s«ld the servant was leaving, I told her to put a notice m the paper for another. She asked me to do it, so I inserted an advertisement — 'Wanted a girl; 1 and by George, sir, the next morning I got up and found myself the happy father of one." N ,

A most miraculous case of sadden cure occurred some time ago at Brunswick, a Melbourne suburb, which is arousing great interest m the city just how; One would think the age of miracles has passed, but it doesn't look like it m the ffece of this startling episode, which seems to have occurred exactly am related : A young girl named Maggie Malley, daughter of a well known resident of t^e suburb mentioned, had been bed-ridden for tea years—indeed, ever since she was a ohild. fc?he was blind, had curvature of the spine, and her ankle bones were turned m. She was taken to no less than four different hospitals, and from each discharged as incurable. Then she waa conveyed baok home, and for three long weary years lay m her bed supine and motionless. On a oertain day this girl, whose life had been one long disease, announces that she is about to be restored to health, and bids her friends get her clothes ready. She then is lifted up, the dseaasd vertebra* move, the dim eyes open, the displaced ankle bones shoot back to their position— and site wxlks' Such is the astounding tale tbat comes from Brunswick, proved beyond doubt by the medical men who attended her, and doubly proved by her present condition of vigor and convalescence. In all the history of fiction waa anything more startling and miraculous ever dreamt of ? Here is a girl bent, blind, and misformed from childhood, cured as by sorae merciful intervening Providence. The wonderful part of It is, too, that she hnew she was going to be cured. She claima that God has done thus much for her as he would do for others who have faith m Him and believa m His power to heal to day as of old, I may end this remarkable history, however, by mentioning that a doctor friend of mine informs me that similar cases of Instantaneous oures have been known to occur before. Bat anyhow, it makeß one think, ponder, and revere, I would like to warn my readers, If It would not be thought outside my prerogative as caußtur, anent a coming evil. The time Is now oo for the " Melbourne Cap Consultation " swindles, and as usaal at this time of the year Melbourne, Victoria, Indeed the whole of trie oolonles, Is being flooded with olroalars oonqerning the bogus sweeps being piomoted. Thank heaven ! we haven't the consultation swindled this side of the Murray, is they were banished by legislators/ but thefr prospectuses come over from Sydney (o) ahoals, I hnye received no leas than five myself. I suppose the promoters thlol? all pressmen muetj be . gambler*, . bqt fortunately for my pocket, I »m n.ot. One sweep promoted by a oertain "(fames Wallace" I kuow to be a downright awlndle. j dareajy some of my readers have reoelved.thls creature's circular, and my advlqe to them fa— keep your money In your pooket and tear the prospectus up. Talking of raolng (apart from swindling) I have juet hid the Victoria Rtolng Club Calendar sent me. Having the little — nhlac m my pooket In the trafo, I p££d the time £ m « k|o « • 9*lvql*tt<m< I find that during the ensuing yea* tner'd will be no leas than two huadeed and tweptj.nrae 4»ya of raolng wltbJa fifty

miles of the Melbourne Post Office. Whe will say we are not a sporting community after that ? This week I find there a*e cix meetings near Melbourne. Facoy that. No wonder bookmakers thrive end grow fat. They have more oj,por»u liUes for doing so than In acy other patt of the world.

lam something more ih">n pleased to ■cc there seems to bo a go.id chsnae of nor having e'eotr'e Hght'ns '° railway csr~ rlages now. The thine so far has been a disgrace, and tie nil lamps now In use are io fearfolly bad it is next to impossible to read . one's p&per by their light. To us suburbans the quarter vf-an-hour or so's training io the evening is a welcome interval for scanning the paper ; therefore you oan Imagine how bard it is when one has to s've up this luxury for want of light. Three evening* ago (here was a publlo trial of eleotrio lighting, and it was most satisfactory. Ihe light was exoellent, and everyone (I among the number) voted it a perfeot Btiooess. I hope tbe railway people will take it up now altogether, for it will be a great boon to everyone, especially those who have to travel dally. Strange to say, the medlnm used is liquid, something like water. It can be nsed In a lamp just the same as v kerosene, and requires no battery, no vires, oils, or anything. Here is a way oat of the coal strike difficulty. We don't want fires now, it Is too warm. And as for gas, the new liquid eleotriolight Is good rod simple, and cheap tnoogh to supersede It altogether.