THROUGH OUR EXCHANGES.

Ashburton Guardian, Volume VII, Issue 1766, 14 February 1888, Page 2

THROUGH OUR EXCHANGES.

A STAGES DRIVKK 8 fPITAPH. The wel .known JSivada stage driver '* Honk " M nk. who died a >me ihonthe •go, is burled under a t- mb j tone with this extraord'oary legend:—^'Haered to ths Memory of H>nk Monk- The Whitest, \ j Biggest Hearted, and Rpst Known Bt<p;e- j Driver < f the West ; Wh > was Kind to j AU and Thmaht IU of None. Ho Lived j tn a Strange Era and wan a Hnro ; and >he Wheels nf His Coach era now Ringing on Golden Sir^'i." a fbw>_t_. c«imb. The Asa zt U-urt of Indre has just been the scene < f a<i acq'ii t.l wh ot shows a _»-e-*t lack <-f moral sense upon th« part of a j jry. A man named Pierre Cheramy was convicttd of having murdered hin little child during her sleep by ponrlnu vltrol down her throat. The prisoner declared th*t as he was una le to meet the expense of an Increase of family be had resolved to do away with his youngest born. This plea satisfied the jary, aad the Inhuman Cheramy (sat large. ANOTHER TBA-BUT. A despatoh from Macon, Galveston, slves partloalera of a shocking tragedy. It appears that on a Bnn Uy night a man named Nathan Raid, who did not live with his wife, brat ally raurder«d his whole fimily and then committed suioid . ila sent a half-grown boy who lived wi h him after a doctor When the dootor and | b>y returned >h y found tl c c»Mo a he-»o .of smoking ru»o» and In n %-\* charred todies of Held' a wife and their sis children. Fu'ther searoh of th* oremue* .ii-iolosed Held _ b jdy tn the well with his • hroato* l

HOW TO GET UP A **W. Walt until ehe m at her to et prepara tory to going ont, if you w.m to quarrel witn your wire. She will be aura to acik yon if her bonnet v straight. Remark that the lives of nine-ten. bs of the w. men are passed tn thinking whe her thuir bon-n<-ts are strbight, *n t wind up with tbe remark that you never knew bnt one who I had any onmmon sense about her. Wife

wlil ask you wbo that was. Y> v, w'xh • sigh, reply, " Ab, you never mind. 1 ' Wife will ask you why you did not marry her, then. You s*y aba raotedly, " Ah, -why, Indeed 1" A regular row i<* »m*a to follow. RBNNINO OP THE BIBLE. Them wes a a'range soduo recently at a sale nEc labor*, b. An old and ordinary copy « f the Bible w*s put up, and the bidding wet-t on between two ladles until tbe Incredible prioa of £-60 was reached, j when the hammer fell amidst loud cheering It transpired that the Bible (the mtrlnaio value of whioh was perhaps half-a-crawo) h.d belonged to a deceased relative of the ladies, each of whom was determined to obtain it, and as they conld »ff.rd t> indulge the fancy, their relative's estate benefl el greatly n y 'h«ir obstinacy. TBtKVKS OASBD IN BILVBB.

A polio >v ii*tnt.d Oo^au a-.w two men on Biacksone street, Boston, C,S., the other day, whose unwi.ldy actions attracted bis attention. He questioned one of the men, and arrested him on suspicion At tha station-house several hundred dollars' worth of silver were found between hit shirt and vest The silver waa hammered out, so that the fellow waa cad m complete armor. Tha heavy load was supported by a strong belt. When Oogan aaw that he bud o*ptured a burglar, he ran out and otptued the other man after a short chase. He, too, was encased m hamm»»»"d silver arm >r. A girl's composition on boys.

Boya is ineu ti.-tt oavo nut got an big a* their p*pas. and girls is young women oat will be young ladira by-and-bya . M>n was m«de before w .man. When G;d •oofted at Adam he sai . to himself, ' We 1 I guess I can do better th *n tbat if I try *_.am.' and then he made Eve. God liked Eva s > mnoa b -t>er thau he did Adam t »at there h .a bebn more woman *han men \n (he wor d «ver slno*. ■ -. . B ys are a tr ablf, Tb-y ere very w>.aiiug on every hlßg tu. «e__»r ,«r * Xli-k~ a_M have my *ay hr»lf »ho boja m the w» rid w v d be H.tle gir s, and the other half: would bar dolis. . . My p*p* it to nice I I in-' that I guess he must have been a girl when he was a little boy. IN loth with TH* oboom

A baronet, whose town house looks ! npon Oyde Park, r*.o-*n ly di-o»veted <h»t his c deat daughter bad los ■ her heart to an u'ldcr-gro-'m lo.his employment, wh-> a'td to attend the lady on ber dally tide . The- fa'hi.r chanced, nome days ago, to e-ter a Wes* Eal resaurant, where, to his horror, be beheld his oaaiih er and the groom seated at iu-.oh. Tnere was a eoene, of course. The angry parent earned •fi his child, and threatened terrible things to his audacious stable-help. Ihe baronet, upon arriving at home, found the groom before h m ca'-m'y enwaged m his vocation . The baronet rushed at bim, struck him, and was promptly knocked down. The baronet's s><n happened to be on band, and seeing th*. fnte of his father, dashed m to bis defence. The groom sor srqu^ntly left, and has annonnced bis iutf.nt.ou of taking I ga> iroceedinjts to rr cover dam-tges, wages, and satisfaction for other grlevsnow.

i WHY HANLAN WAS BEATEN. ' Oommeutin.! on Hani >u*a lost defrat by Beach, tne •« New Y»rk World " says :— "For he third tma w'thia ft period of three years ad ward Hanlan has met defeat at the hinds of William Be.ich ln Australia. Pieviuun to his first visit to tbe antipodes, m 1885, Hanlan was the champion oarsman of the world, whiob proud title be won at the Centennial K.eg.tt* Aa long as he acted under t c advice of capable and judicious managers si co '8 waa hie; Be bad not been reared m iflltftmt circomsninces, ani his handlers k ow that good wholesome food and a temperate life were essential for the pre*erva i, n nf hla muscular energy ; but success swelled the champion's hetd, and walth broouht a desire for high living. C irned beef and cabbage were replaoed by quail on toast, and strengthening ale waa aupplautel by exhilarating champagne. Tne bietory of Haitian's downfall is only an episode from the life of all great attletes who have permi t-d success to m ko them obi viius of the doty whiob tven they owe to nature '

A HOBMBLE AFFAIK. A s' ooktng bo< Qn is r«sptn ted by American popers to oave been witnessed si W.bbe'vile, Miohignn, reoently. Tne town loek-np, a'one-sory wooden structure, wis discovered to be on fire. Above theoiacltiingoftlit. fl mes cries were heard from an inmate tf one of the cells. When the oitiz ns arrived the doomed nan waa seen frantically beating the ba-a of h's cell and otymg for beip. The people were powerless to rescue him, al'hough m .ny tried to do so, and lv the presence of the crowd he slowly roaetef to death. Little by lit le the doomed man was forced back, but only when the bars b> oome red hot did he aoandon ali hope cf eboape. The horror of tne eitu* tion proved suoh a f Uhtful mental strain on the prisoner that he became insane Tearing h a scorched clothing off he 1 dashed atftinst the bars, an 1 grabbed the red hot iron m the vain « ff >rt to escape. An odour of burned flish pervaded the air. Frantically cursing the crowd for not helping him, the roisttug man rushed madly around the narrow eaolosure, wkile the spectators a.ood rooted b> horror to the spot. Gradually hla or les grew weaker, and he was seen to sink ti tbe 1! -or, and so^n all was over. Th? prisoner waa Newhalt Tyler, 38 years old He has hewn imprisoned for striking a boy j on the head.