THE WIFE'S STRATEGY

Ashburton Guardian, Volume VII, Issue 1677, 1 October 1887, Page 3

THE WIFE'S STRATEGY

The most brilliant Bfcrateeenn of war often app ar insignificant when ownpnred with the devices prftcrised by women — particularly married women — to accomplish their aims. A gcntlemau residing vn Superior street haß a wi'e who goes in<o hyßterica every time the Fashion-plate changes, while he, on (h9 contrary, baß »n intenso antipathy for •' frills und flounces and fluanadlddles f f that sort." A few evenings ago he came home from lodi'e meetiag and began making p r epara tlona to rcttro. He had ja&t chased lh« cat out into tho shed, fastened the pantry window, and B'arteci to climb on to his downy straw tick, when he heard a low moan coming from the partner of his jnya and sorrows acd stray nickels. Turning up the light, he saw that she was ap parently sleeping, bnt a couple of bright tears gliateued on her eyelids, her bo3om heaved with emotion, and as her lips moved he caught the words ; " No, he shall never know how much I want that blue-striped silk dress at only 2 25d01s a yard. I will wear my younu life out with household drudgery, and have my old dresses made over, I love him too muoh to bother him with such matters, but I did wart that blue so bad !" and jaat then one of the tears trickled down her cheek. Her husband was overoome with remorse, and going into the other room, he oalled himself a hard-hearted brute, and kicked himself all over tho house — mentally. He said nothing, but the very next day he went out and purchased the identical blue-stripped silk dress. His wife said she was delighted and oalled him an o'd dear, and wondered how he oonld have found the identical piece of silk she wanted ; but he only smiled as that feeling of heavenly otlm and silent joy itole over him whioh comes to a man when he hai performed a truly noble and aelf-saorificing deed. A short time af :erwards, however, he overheard his wife remarking to the next door neighbor: " Yes, the plan works jost splendid ! I had a great time trying to squeeze out. those two tears, thou.'b. I was afraid he'd find the onion I had under the pillow." Since then ihe husband has been walking aronnd town with the dnz^d expression of a man who has been hit on the head wi<h a piledrlv«r.