PADDY MURPHY ON THE COMET.

Ashburton Guardian, Volume IV, Issue 806, 30 November 1882, Page 2

PADDY MURPHY ON THE COMET.

Lambton, Kay,'. ; ;; Wellinton, Nov. 20, 1882.

I’ve got back agin from, vhfe North; !ye see, an’ I’m havin’ a spell after my jewtios in the rouH , o’ ,Maorl Plinnypotinshirk'y. I’ve thrown aside poly ticks in the manetime, and turned me attention to .asthronomical purshnits'; I’ve had a long discourse with Archdaieon Stock, .on the. subject o’ the comet, an’that riverind gintleman has convinced me that Piazzi Smith is all in the wrong, an’ that the Jews must return to Palealoine before there’s a gineral burst up in the univarse. He tells me that my dear frind Misther Shrimski intends to stand for one o’ the constituences of Palestine, as soon as the return of the chosen people takes place, an’ that, in his opinion, Sir Joolius Vogel will be the first prime-ear itt‘Jerusalem. I’ll bet me life that Mr Shrimski will be found on the Opposition binches. Well, afther the Archdaioon’s explanation, faix we’ve no cause' tc feat the comet. ,l l’vo sthruck off the followin’ varses inscribed to Misther Piazzi- Smith ! •* 1 ’ - Och, Misther Piazzi, be aisy. An’ don’t thry to frighten us so, Begorra, ye’ll dhrive us all crazy, But, darlint, yer jokin’, I know. While watchin’ the beutiful comet, Ver brain has been turned, I’ll go bail,

An though yer a grate distance from it. Yer head must be caught in, its tail. Och, don’t I remimber, me honey, Yer Perrimid stories so fine, . , An’ now - faix, begorra, its funny— Yer sthruck with the symbol an’ sign Av speedy disthruction an’ danger— Already we’ve sint up a wail For pity : the sky-scrapin’ sthranger Is waggin’ his beutiful tail. I’m tould be asthronomers able, The comet one evenin’ dhropt in To dine at ould Jupither’s table, ; i t . An’ as he’s a Hider-o-gin, He swallowed his Schnapps from a bucket An’ dhrank of his “ Square ” be the pail So freely an’ sweetly he tuck it. The liquor got into his tail. An’ whin in his cups he got frisky, He thried to kiss Vauus so chaste, ' But Mars, who’d been tastin’ some whisky, Kicked out the unmannerly baste. An’ iver since then 'through the ages ; ’ (The blackguard, he should be in gaol) :■ He flashes an’ flares up an’ l rages, ! ■ =' An’ slashes the stars with his tail. Och, Misther Piazzi, be aisy, I know that yer fond av yer fun, But don’t let the comet, : so crazy,* ; ' Jump into the mouth o’ the sun. His fit o’ dilatium thrnimini Has made lovely Luna turn pale ; Och, plaize put a stop to his schaimin’s, Piazzi, hould on to his tail. PADDY MURPHY.