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Ashburton Guardian, Volume III, Issue 632, 10 May 1882, Page 2

Once More, —There was a clean sheel at the Police Court again to-day.

Tenders. —Tenders are invited for the supply of fuel to Borough Schools.

A Remittance Man. —Herbert Lockwood, the young remittance man referred to in our telegrams yesterday as having run through L 9,000 in about as many months, was sentenced at Auckland yesterday to one month with hard labor, for passing valueless cheques. Getting Better. —The many friends of Mr Winter, partner in the firm of Davies and Winter, auctioneers, Rakaia, will be glad to hear that he is recovering from a very severe attack of illness, which incapacitated him from work for some time past.

Debiting Society.—We again, remind members of the above Society that the ordinary meeting has been postponed until next Wednesday, owning to Mrs Hampson’s visit. We understand that the Vice-President will deliver his promised address on next evening of meeting, and that a debate on capital punish ment will take place shortly. Political. —The Press special wiring from Wellington last night says There is nothing fresh as yet to report about session matters. The Ministers are hard at work daily in active preparation, but they preserve unusually close reticence as to the nature of their programme. I understand they are very anxious that if possible it shall first bo disclosed in the Governor’s speech.

The Accident to Mr E. G. Weight.— We are glad to learn that the accident to Mr E. G. Wright, adverted to in our last issue, was not so serious as we were led to imagine. Mr Wright ran after the runaway horse and trap and managed to seize the reins, hut while holding on them he was pulled off his feet, but fell cle;ir of the trap, which did not pass over him. The only harm he sustained was a sprained ankle. The little boy was frightened, but kept in his seat. The runaway was stopped just as it entered Mr Wright’s garden, without any damage resulting.

Fiji Items. —The s.s. Taiaroa arrived at Auckland yesterday from Fiji, bringing news up to the 30th inst. The folhwing items will be found interesting : Kerosene has been discovered at Suva, and steps are being taken to prove the permanence of the springs. Croker, from New Zealand, formerly of Auckland, who has started shipping fruit to various parts hi New Zealand, has forwarded by the Taiaroa a fresh shipment of shaddocks, to be converted into bitters on arrival at their destination. Governor do Veaux has discovered that the tale of oppression of the people and maladministration is not an unfounded tale. The cry of the people from Rewa and Naitiviri has reached his ears, and he has made an example of the high chiefs and native officials responsible. The Most Dreaded Punishment.— Garotting, chiefly owing to the mistaken leniency of the judges, has again c >mo into fashion, says the London correspondent of the Melbourne Argus A Dublin rough with three others set upon one old gentleman and nearly killed him. “ Prisoner at the bar, I shall give you twelve months’ imprisonment,” said the recorder, “ and at the commencement of that imprisonment ” “ Oh, don t whip me, sir ; anything but that. I had rather have five years.” Recorder: “No, I will not. I condemn you to twelve months’ imprisonment, and one whipping upon entering the gaol.” Prisoner (weeping): “ Then I won’t live another night.” It is probable that oven if this lying scoundrel had carried out his threat the recorder would have borne the consequences with equanimity ; but surely after this—the man’s preferring live years to one if only he wore not flogged—no one can talk of the effect of flogging not being “ deerrent.”

An Aged Setter. —There is said to be a jolly old dog—a setter—in London who c is nearly eighty years old. He is a type- i setter. - Robbed two Hours After Arrival. 1 Mrs Cole, wife of a Fiji merchant, ' arrived at Auckland yesterday, per Taia- 1 roa. Two hours afterwards she was ' robbed at her lodgings of a purse contain- ■ ing LlB, and her through ticket to 1 Sydney. 1 A Lilliputian Baby —The Hobart Town Mercury reports that Mr Jacob Cohen, of Jerusalem, Tasmania, is the happy father of one of the smallest infants that have ever seen the light of day. The babe, a girl, is aged about fivo months, and weighs 4lbs, the length of its body being not quite 17in. Interesting Figures. Census-taking is a new mania of the day, but its outcome is otten highly instructive. It appears that a public-house census was recently taken in Bristol, whence it appeared that in four hours on Saturday evening 104,000 entered the various public-houses—s4,3oo being men, 86,000 women, and 18,000 children. The Sunday census gave only 60,000 as the number of men, women, and children attending church or chapel. Local Option at Tinwald. —The poll for local option at Tinwald took place yesterday, and resulted thus: —In favor of increasing publicans’ licenses, 34 ; against, 16 ; majority for increase, 18. In favor of increasing New Zealand wine licenses, 29 ; against, 13 ; majority for increase, 16. In favor of increasing accommodation licenses, 26 ; against, 17 ; majority for increase, 9. In favor of increasing bottle licenses, 23 ; against, 18 ; majority for increase, 5. ‘ Thus it will be seen that Tinwald has not followed Ashburton s lead in the matter of licensing. A Blow. —A bit of a breeze at Westport yesterday rather astonished the natives of that place. It blew so hard that the verandah of Gibson’s Hotel was blown clean away, shooting gracefully over the building and settling down 100 yards away. A private house was unroofed and some of the materials twisted amongst the trees 400 yards away. Fences, windows, and chimneys were smashed, gateposts pulled out like decayed teeth in the forceps of the dentist, and big trees up-rooted. Fortunately, there was no loss of life, but the place looks as if it has sustained a siege. Horticultural Society. A Committee meeting of this Society, was held last evening at Mr Jones’ room. Present —Messrs Stephenson, Sealy, Simmonds, Davison, Collins, W. H. Zouch, and S. E. Poyntz, Hon. Sec. The chief business was the consideration of the prizes and a revision and addition to the programme for the next Show. It was ■ decided to increase considerably the amount of money prizes for many of the exhibits, particularly in the open classes, : so that greater competition may reasoni ably be expected next year. After considering carefully the catalogue and other business, the Committee adjourned at a late hour.

The Gravedigger's Threat. —“ What’s to pay, John I ” asked a sciubby farmer of the sexton of Kilwinning, who had just finished sorting the sod on the grave of the farmer’s wife. ‘‘Five shillins’.”

“ For that sma’ job ? It’s oot o’ the question.” “ Wed, ye may think sae, but that’s ma charge.” “Five shillins’ ! Ye’re weel paid wi’ half-a-croon.” “ I’ve tell’t ye ma charge.” “There’s fowre shillin’s raither than ha’e ony quarrel wi’ yo the day, John, but not a farden more.” “ Now see,” said John, holding the money in the open palm of his left hand, while his right hand held his spade, “ Boon wi’ the ither shillin’, or up she comes.” The alarmed farmer lost no time in paying the balance.

Better Late than Never. —A Christ

church contemporary, drawing attention to Reuter’s shortcomings, says that it has found in the Australian papers what it has been waiting for in vain from Reuter, who, having supplied all the preliminaries, carefully omitted to wire the most interesting part of the business. The items are the marriage of Prince Leopold and the execution of Dr Lamson for the murder of his brother-in-law. They are as follows :—“ London, April 27. The marriage of the Princess Helena, of Wal-deck-Pyrmont, sister of the Queen of Holland, with H.R.H. Prince Leopold, Duke of Albany, was solemnised at Windsor Castle to-day. The marriage took place in St George’s Chapel, the arrangemen tsbeing similar to those carried outwhen the Duke of Connaught was married in March. 1879. The festivities were favored by fine weather. Thirty Royal personages were present, including the King and Queen of Holland, the German Crown Prince and Princess, and the Grand Duke of Hesse and his family. After the ceremony had been performed, the Duke and Duchess of Albany left for Claremont. They will shortly enter on a lengthened cruise in the Royal yacht Osborne.” “ April 28. Dr Lamson, who confessed to the murder of his young brother-in-law, was executed to-day. ”

An Eggstraordinary Story. —An assault of an impertinent and offensive nature was committed in Auckland a few days ago upon Mr Young, grocer, of Shortland street, by a shoemaker named Hutson, living in Princes street. It appears that the irate shoemaker had been suffering from indigestion, and fancied a couple of eggs for breakfast. He sent for half a dozen, and finding a counle of them rather musty, although Mr Young considered them sweet, he went hurriedly to the shop of the grocer, and, without saying a word, threw four eggs into Mr Young’s face and bolted. Mr Young leaped over his counter, and immediately was in full chase, Mr Young with his coat, and Hutson panting in his colorless slippers. The scene caused immense sensation for some time. Hutson rushed into the shop of Messrs Hellaby, butchers, and crouched behind the block, and unfortunately split his trousers in the sudden stoop. Mr Young caught Hutson by the extended leg and raised his fist, as if intending to take muscular vengeance on the cobbler, but was persuaded not to strike, but appeal for redress at the Police Court, which he proposes to do. The cries of the poor shoemaker, “Don’t, don’t, pray don’t strike a fellah when he’s down,” caused roars of laughter among the interested spectators.

South Rakaia Road Board. —The usual monthly meeting of the above Board was held on Thursday last. Present— Messrs 0. N. Mackio (chairman), D. C. Holmes, L. White, Allan, and Coster. The Clerk's report was read and adopted. It was resolved that tenders be invited for ro-forming and repairing about three miles of Acton road; also about twelve chains of Chertsey road. A letter was received from Messrs Holmes and Longhrey, solicitors to C. Jackson, with reference to refencing a gravel reserve. It was resolved that the Board obtain legal advice on the subject. It was resolved that A. Haslett be requested to go on with his contract on Hartnell’s road. A letter was received from the Ashburton County Council with reference to the sum of LSOO granted to the Hoard for the purpose of culverts and crossings to the water-races in the district. It was resolved to acknowledge the receipt of the letter, and to refer the County Council to the Board’s communition, which has not yet been replied to. It was resolved that the Cleik be allowed to act as presiding officer at the pollings under the Licensing Act. It was resolved to call fresh tenders for the formation of Cemetery and Collins’ road; also, for fencing and forming the road from the township to Thompson’s track road. The sum of LC9 15s lid was passed for payment, and the Board adjourned.

A Fishy Paragraph. —The miraculous draught of fishes was completely thrown in the shade yesterday (says the Oamaru Times ) down at the Breakwater. That part of the harbor near the landing steps was alive with sprats crowded in masses, packed almost literally like sardines in a box. These had been driven from the open water by barracoota and other large fish, which might be seen hovering at the outskirts of the shoal. The mass of fish was particularly dense just at the luncheon hour, fortunately for the men engaged on the breakwater and reclamation contracts, and a general descent was made on the water. A charge or two of dynamite brought the fish in myriads to the surface, and 'anything that would hold fish was instantly brought into requisition. Buckets, boxes, barrels, sieves, seeks, kits, bags, handkerchiefs, hats, trouserspockets, billies, pots, pans, and receptacles of every seizablo kind were seized in the impromptu fishery. Three or four boats were soon more than ankle-deep in fish, while the less fortunate “longshore” anglers had nevertheless no difficulty in capturing hundreds. The sprats, or whatever they were, averaged about six or seven inches in length, and are capital eating.

Gambling in London. —The gambling ulcer seems to be eating the very heart out of English polite society. And the game, of all others, that is in the ascendant is the essentially democratic one of “poker.” Little did the rough miners and others of California, where it was first introduced, imagine, when they were “bluffing” or “ standing ” that the game would some day carry such sway in London as to necessitate the vigorous interference of a leader of ton. Happy for that society is it that there is a lady fearless enough to put her foot down and veto the game at her assemblies. The Wovld avers that a lady of fashion did this, and that, moreover, “ poker ” is perniciously the rage. So it is in Wellington in certain places ; but it is to be devoutly hoped that the ladies will resolutely unite to keep it out of their houses, or, indeed, any other kind of gambling. I did, though, hear the other day a singular and sinister whisper about drawing-rooms and decoy-ducks. Now, from such degrading practices may the Heavens defend this community. I didn’t believe the report, though. It savored too much of those lying Paul Pry, night-cart rags, the lowest strata of the so-termed “Society Papers”—things of the reptilian class, which hang about society’s skirts, and out of their own filthy imaginings evolve society doings. Malace and iying are their characteristics. —“ Asmodeus,” in the N.Z. Mail. Holloway’s Ointment and Pills.— Outward Infirmities.—Before the discovery o: these remedies many case of sores, ulcers, &c., were pronounced to be hopelessly incurable, because the treatment pursued tended to destroy the strength it was incompetent to preserve, and to exasperate the symptoms it was inadequate to remove. Holloway’s Pills exert the most wholesome powers over the unhealthy flesh or skin, without debarring the patient from fresh air and exercise, and thus the constitutional vigor is husbanded while the most malignant ulcers, abscesses, and skin diseases are in process of cure. Both Ointment and Pills make the blood richer and pmer, instead of permitting it to fall into that poor and watery stale so fatal to many laboring under chronic ulcerations —[Advt.J