A REMARKABLE EXPERIENCE.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XVI, Issue 230, 27 September 1881, Page 1

A REMARKABLE EXPERIENCE.

The recent experiment of Profesor Von Sckweinhund, of the Polytechnic institute, says the "American Traveller," promised to be of great interest to all philosophers, and especially to electricians. Although this promise was not fulfilled, it is, nevertheless, true that the experience in question Iwas quite unprecedented, and deserves the attention of all thinking men. On the night of the 21st December, Professor Von Schweinhund was spending 'the evening with a number of friends at the residence of- Smith, discussing the philosophy of the unconditioned in connection with lager beer. At about 1 o'clock a.m., it ocurred to ! him that Mrs Von Schweinhund would ■be uneasy at his prolonged absence ;from home, and would undoubtedly isit up for him and welcome him with ienergetic hands in an exceedingly iwarm manner. He therefore took a final glass of beer,' put on his capacious ;ulster, and bade the company farewell :The night was exceedingly co ld, and the pavement was unusually active in its movements. This, together with a weakness in the Professor's legs due to a severe cold in the head, led him to pause by a convenient lamp-post to 'collect his thoughts. He rested for several minutes, and, summonino- his energies, prepared to resume his walk To his great alarm he found he could" not move from the post. An unseen and unknown force held him tight to the iron lamp-post, and the most franctic efforts could not enable him to release himself. His first impression was that he had been tied to the lamppost by -thieves while resting himself, but he could not discover the slightest trace of any rope, and was 'Omß com. pelled to abandon the hypothesis. Soon he began. to feel a strange sensation— a cold current was running from his jbrefist bone downward, and being a •profound philosopher, he reasoned that, : as be felt this current in front, it must really be in active operation somewhere else, and was, undoubtedly, running down his spinal column. After deep meditation, he suddenly- remembered that he had heard that certain lights were soon to be lighted l>y the electric light. He looked upward at the lamp ' above his head, and saw that not only was it extremely bright, but that it 1 seemed to be^ divided into three or four separateiam f ps. He now comprehended the mystery of his imprisonment. The lamp-post to which he was fastened was evidently one of those to which the electric light had been supplied. The electric current passing through the iron lamp-post had been switched off by the attraction of his spinal column, and was flowing through him, producinga sensation of extreme cold, and fastening him with a force of several tons to the lamp-post. The horror of his situation now clearly stared Professor Von Schweinhund iv the face. He saw that not only would he be held to the lamp-post until some one should.come to his assist«we ana turn off the eleotrio current,

but that in all probality the electricity i would gradually disintegrate his spinal marrow, and thus either kill him outbright or reduce him to a miserable, | spineless, gelatinous wreck. Moreover, he feared that the cold produced by the current would affect his heart, and by . disturbing the circulation bring about a i fatal result. In these circumstances he howled for help, but the silence of the midnight streets remained unbroken except by his agonised voice. About two o'clock two young men came down the jstreet and, attracted by his cries, kindly ; stopped and listened to his story. In : the most unfeeling manner they burst :into a laugh and refused to give him I any help. rThey even made rude remarks concerning beer, and told him ; that the cool night air was good for him. | Professor Von Schweinhund lost His | temper) and addressed to them the I strongest language contained in the I German dictionary ; but they only laughed the. more, and went on theirr wicked and heartless way. 1 It was nearly morning when a shapely policeman approached, and, after listening to the Professor's pitiful story, said to him : " See here, old man, if you're that '' drunk that you don't know you've buttoned your ulster round that there lamppost, I guess I'd better take you in." Light dawned on the mind of the philosopher as he listened to the policeman and glanced at himself in the glare of the bull's eye lantern. There was a basis of truth in the policeman's remarks. Professor Von Schweinhund had buttoned his ulster round the lamp-post, and had thus unwittingly made himself a prisoner. The coat "was promptly unbuttoned, and the prolessor resumed hiß home- j ward walk. . Now thab he was free, he i rather regretted that his electrical hypothesis had proved to be false. Had it been true, he could have written a powerful pamphlet on the subject.