THE EVILS OF BACHELORDOM.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XV, Issue 249, 11 December 1880, Page 4

THE EVILS OF BACHELORDOM.

"My good friends," says tbe editor of an American newspaper, who went to another state, and took himself a wife, "in announcing the fact of our return home, with a rib, we cannot refrain from expressing our profound disgust of bachelorism and bachelors. We are well aware that in days gone by we occasionally made ourselves ridiculous in the eyes of sensible men by upholding the bachelor state -as the life of happiness, independence, and earthly glory. But we were young and green then, and of course knew but one side of the subject. Now staud up here, you consarned ugly pictnre of humanity, rejoicing in the name of bachelors, and answer us a few questions. What are you fit for in this world ? What interest have you in the generations unborn yon read of ? Where will you be when old men, if your vile habits ever permit you to arrive at a good old age ? Won't you be like lonely, scarred, and scathed trees standing in a big clearing without: a companion, and your life unprotected from the frosts by young saplings and shrubs at your feet ? Or won't you be like pumpkins in a corn-field, more prominent, because of your, prodigious ugliness, than the stalks at your sides laden with golden grain ? Hold your heads up, and talk like men, whether you can act so or not. Not don't .you feel ashamed of yourselves •'? Now looj_ at the girls around you, all smiling and sugaiv-hearts overflowing with.lovb ready to be spilled on the first good fellow that can touch : their sympathi-ds — feeling as rich as cream, which by a kindred spirit, can soon.be -worked into" butter and spread over your life, till you" are as happy as the birds of thje ! spring. Look at 'em and feel— the dis- J gusting position which you occupy in the Cabbage-garden of humanity? Whaji )' are you holding back for ? Now, just reform — put- on your ; best * looks and your other coat — visit -the girls; ice-j cream them — then propose, get accepted, marry, and the country will rely on you as a faithful and well disposed citizen*' 5 . . ,. * . _...-.—_ .... — , 1 1_