THE RAILWAY ROYAL COMMISSION AND ITS CHAIRMAN.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XV, Issue 129, 31 May 1880, Page 4

THE RAILWAY ROYAL COMMISSION AND ITS CHAIRMAN.

(Lyttelton Times.) 0 I Curtis was a citizen Of credit and renown, Superintendent he had been

In famous Nelson town In Parliament for many years He long had held a scat, But at the last election he

Unhappily was beat. Then Johnny Hall to Curtis said,

" Cheer up and be consoled, I'm ruler of the Colony,

Though you are in the cold. " Royal Commissions now ahound,

There's one about railways, Just suit you — cost no object, and

Grand tour — New Zealand pays. " We'll give you Pearce and Wright,

Clark, and a man called Reid, And you will fill the chair, and smoke . The strong nicotian weed." He soon replied, " I do admire

Of Ministries hut one, And that is yours, my dearest Hall,

Therefore it shall he done. " I am a sound Conservative,

As all my life doth show, Though my good friend the Treasurer Is Liberal, Aye know.

(t If he will freely fork out cash I-'ll'yjquch. to hold it tight, Royal' Commissions should, of course, In sovereigns delight." John Hall embraced his loving friend, O'erjoyed to find that none, Although on duty bent, would take More care of number one. Commission met — Curtis in chair, Stood up, and did explain, First duty was to order in Cigars and dry champagne. A motion then was passed nem. con. For list of crack hotels, And preparations made to go About like royal swells. They drove in coaches four in hand, And trains express went in, Five precious souls, and all agog, To dash through thick and thin. They lived regardless of expense, And sent each little bill To their good friend the Treasurer, For payment at his till.

Like.lightning they flashed through the land, No sooner seen than gone ; The thunder in a public growl . .Came slowly rolling on. From special coaches and from trains Minute inspection made, They saw at once what lines would pay Cost, traffic, haulage, grade. And then at plays, between the acts, They got, with their cigars, Important information from - - Maids who preside at bars. They did each Island in no time, But twice made lengthened stay, At.llokitika two whole hours, And two more at the Grey.

Away went Curtis neck or nought, And colleagues in full fig, We little dreamt when they set out Their running such a rig. Away went Curtis and his four, The scandal spreads around, For. each Commissioner, 'tis said, Will cost a thousand pound. Feasts, journeys, Bights, at public cost, All goes like marriage hells, Our small great men the oyster get, The public gets the shells.

Then let us all beware of these Commissioners of the Crown, "Which, like balloons, go up so high, And then again come down. We feel no wiser than before, Except indeed, alas ! That we have lost a tidy stim Of money gone in gas. Now let us say, long live the Queen, And Curtis long live he, And when he writes his grand report May we be there to see.